That Pronoun Thing — Again!

Yes, it’s all true. That pronoun thing is getting worse. Not only do I find speakers and writers putting themselves first in multiple groups (me and her, me and him, me and them), but… oh the pain! Here’s what ruffles my poor aching eyes and ears:

John and I’s house is for sale.
Her’s and mine’s anniversary is tomorrow.
It’s celebration will be simple.
Don’t tell me that their’s and our’s spelling is wrong.

Well, guess what? It is! Those sentences include apostrophes that have invaded the Pronoun Patch.  What’s almost as bad, the pronouns have been mis-used, abused, rattled, scrambled, and out of whack. Here's what those sentences should look and sound like:

John’s and my house is for sale. (Our house is for sale would do.)
Her and my anniversary is tomorrow. (Awkward, but better. Our anniversary is tomorrow / much better.)
Its celebration will be simple. (See? No apostrophe at all!)
Don’t tell me that their and our spelling is wrong. (Again, awkward, but better. Don’t tell me that all our spelling is wrong / much better.)

Pay attention now:

There are no apostrophes in possessive pronouns: yours, ours, theirs, mine, his, hers, its. 

Please write that in big 72-point font and paste it across your refrigerator, pen, pencil, computer keyboard, nose, and mirror. No apostrophes pu-leez!