Myriad Questions or a Myriad of Questions

How do you use the word “myriad”? As a noun or an adjective? The snobby grammarian purists (and poets) insist on using it as an adjective; as in: They ask myriad questions. or Myriad participants attended the conference.

Then there are the pure grammarians — my kind of anarchy grammarians who use language to suit them. They readily accept: They ask a myriad of questions. or A myriad of participants attended the conference.

What’s right? you ask, forgetting that we anarchists do not recognize the words right and wrong. Here’s another opportunity to make your choice the prime factor. Which do you like best?  Until the 1800s, myriad was used in English as a noun. Then along came a poet named Samuel Taylor Coleridge.

Now you can blame the confusion on Coleridge and his “Hymn to the Earth,” in which he included the lines:

O Earth! the throe of thy self-retention:
Inly thou strovest to flee, and didst seek thyself at thy centre!
Mightier far was the joy of thy sudden resilience; and forthwith
Myriad myriads of lives teem’d forth from the mighty embracement.

 So now it’s up to you. Both uses are acceptable. But you wouldn’t stoop to playing the snooty card… would you? Or do thou strovest to flee?

We be; you be; all us folks be;

How come “to be” doesn’t act like a verb? It is probably the most used (and overused) verb in the English language — in its myriad forms: is, are, am, were, was, have been. With a verb like “to run”, we can cover the gamut: I run, you run, we run, etc. But not the verb “to be”. Grrrr!

Please avoid trying to push this round verb into a square sentence. It’s okay to write:

“I want to be a star.”
or “To be a star takes work.”
or ”You need talent to be a star.”

It is NOT okay to use this poor little rich verb in the following manner:

“When you’re a star, be it now or in two weeks…”
or “You are special, if you be understanding that.”
or “ When you be a star, you’ll know fame and fortune.”

Any writer who wants to become a star must understand the fine point usage notes concerning the verb “to be”. Got it?

What Do You Get “For Free”?

Where on earth did the idea come that you receive some things for free, rather than just free? You hear it on the media, even see it in print. Why use that preposition (for) when “free” is an upstanding, stable, reliable adjective or adverb? Free means “uncontrolled, without cost, unchained, unfettered”, and other such synonyms.

Of course there will be those who believe for free refers to the “without cost or charge” definition. Believe with me that extra words clutter up good writing, and offer your book “free” for three weeks, or offer a gift “free with purchase”, or offer your services “free to the first ten customers”.

Sloppy writers overuse prepositions. More cases in point (also in italics): “Jill tumbled down from the hill.” “Where should she have gone to?” “All of the king's men... ”, "Maizy set the plate down on the table.” “The plate fell off of the table.” And my least most awful unnecessary usage example: “These writers don’t know where it’s at.” (Boo! Hiss!)

Save Our Prepositions. Don’t overuse them!

Why Don’t You Believe Me?

Incredible! Unbelievable! I can’t believe it’s not true. Notice how these words are used.

1. He had an incredible body.
2. She was unbelievably gorgeous.
3. I can’t believe how cold it is.
4. Did that success you mentioned actually happen?
5. I am really happy for you.

Number 1 says “This guy had a body that no one would believe.” (Only a Schwartnegger could have that.)
Number 2 shows the woman as more gorgeous than anyone could comprehend. (Nobody can be that gorgeous.)
Number 3 shows your level of mentality, that you can’t believe 10-degrees below is cold. (Brrr! dammit!)
Number 4 questions your veracity. (“Are you lying?”)
Number 5 is a sarcastic way to say, “I may not look happy for you, but I am.” (Honestly, would I kid you?)

How often do you stretch belief with these words? Credible means “able to be believed”. Believable means “convincing or realistic”. Actually refers to “the truth or facts of a situation”. Really is another way to say that something is real, as opposed to a figment of the imagination. I find that many people use “really” as a way to say “but” (not so!) in order to cover up their disbelief that the speaker thinks something is so (I really like that color on you — but…). Ah, you remember that “but” generally negates anything that precedes it.

Quote-Contents-Unquote

When do you use quotation marks, how many, and where? Forget the “rules” you were fed in school. Many options are available to suit the inventive writer.

Standard/Normal/Ho-hum maybe:
Double quote-dialog-double unquote — “What do you mean, choice?” you ask. (New paragraph) “You have options,” I say.

Standard/Normal/Ho-hum quote within a quote — “Someone will tell you ‘Listen to me,’ and you have to listen.’’

Standard/Normal/Ho-hum quote that is not dialog — The word you want is “choice”. (punctuation outside the mark) 

British/Normal/Ho-hum:
Single quote-dialog-single unquote — ‘You Brits do it this way.’ (New paragraph) ‘Yes. Neah, neah, neah, U.S.’

Creative:
Eliminate quotation marks — What do you mean, choice? I'm suggesting options to you.

Creative:
(You decide how to handle dialog quotations. I’m waiting to hear your ideas.)

With E or Without

How do you spell — acknowledg ment? or judg ment? Do you stick an E in there to make the words: acknowledgement and judgement?

Uh-uh! That’s a dead giveaway that you’re with “them” (the Brits).

If you’re a true U.S.-er,  omit the E. Otherwise the Grammar Anarchist will be after you.

When you don’t want them to know...

Writers:
You keep being told to write clearly, actively, directly, so that readers know exactly what you’re saying. Not always. There are times when you don’t want readers to know what’s going on — when blame or responsibility is involved, when you don’t want to name names.

“Errors have been made and others will be blamed.” This is passive writing.

Passive writing says “something happened, but we’re not saying what”; someone did something, but we’re not saying who”. Notice that the general order of subject-verb-object has been reversed. Rather than “Bob erred with the estimate; his information was faulty”, the message may appear as: “The estimate was in error because of faulty information”. No foul; no blame!

Who would write this way? Those who wish to add complexity or obfuscation to their words (think: legal documents, insurance policies, financial information, apologies). Passive writing has its place; but most often, something is being hidden.

How many sentences in this posting are passively written?

What keeps coming “between us”?

That wretched mis-use of the objective pronouns that follow “between”: namely me, us, you, her/him/it, them. Pay attention now: you do NOT see the pronouns I, we, she/he, they. There’s a reason for that.  

I, we, she/he, they are subjective pronouns, the DOers.

me, us, you, her/him/it, them are the objective pronouns, the DOees

Because “between” is a preposition, it must be followed by the object (DOee) pronouns.

YES:   me, us, you, her/him/it, them 
NO:     I, we, she/he, they
 Use any combinations of the YES pronouns after “between”.

Two more notes — 1) When there are more than two pronouns (objectives), use “among”.
2) Be courteous. Put the other pronoun first and, modestly, use the “me/us” last. 


CORRECT (hurray-whee):

Let’s keep this between you and me.
The competition is between her and me.
The promise between him or her is to accomplish the work.

INCORRECT (boo-hiss):

Let’s keep this between me and you. (you and me)
The competition is between him, her, and you. (Use “among”)
The promise between you and she is to work together. (you and her)

Got it? The Grammar Anarchist wrote The Anarchist's Guide to Grammar to avoid just such confrontations as this. Order your copy now and don’t let me catch you at this between thing again.

Verb Degrees

Choose a verb, any verb, preferably  a benign one and its extreme opposite (stroll --> race; tap --> pound; sip --> gulp). Insert other verbs that will take the benign verb, by small increments, to the extreme at the other end.

Here's my challenge: Move from “whisper” --> “screech”.

 My attempt: whisper, murmur, hum, speak, converse, enunciate, emphasize, shout, yell, scream, shriek, cry, screech…

Can you insert some other verbs in between?

So so-so!

Speakers use place savers — words or sounds that give the brain time to catch up to the tongue. The primary place savers include sounds, such as “uh, er, um”. Of late, they’re being replaced by words, which range from “so” and “in fact” to “the fact is,  it's my belief”,  and “for some reason or other”. You have to wonder if brains have slowed down or tongues have speeded up.

During a recent lecture, a speaker with what must be the slowest brain in the world nearly put me into a coma. In the first place, she spoke so slowly, my brain was in danger of falling asleep. When I noticed she was using the space saver “so”,  I started counting the times she used it. Within a period of five minutes, she used “so” more than 25 times (that computes to five times a minute). It may have been more, but my brain was very sluggish by that time.

Don’t turn off your audience — whether they are listening or reading your words — by over-using space savers. Everyone has favorites. Here are some to watch for: and, but, then, now, I think, I feel, I believe (we know you think, feel or believe what you’re saying; you don’t have to tell us), and the ever-popular so.