Those Muddled Brits!

Imagine a language that uses single quote marks in dialog; spells color with a “u”; imagine a language that calls an elevator a “lift”; imagine a language that uses commas at random; and imagine a language that won't use the language of its own (Shakespeare)! That’s British English. Says Shakespeare: ‘Beware what you call good English.’ This from a man whose followers cannot decide how to spell his name (Shakespear, Shakspere, Shakespere...).

I’m ranting today about the British take-back of the United States. It’s happening quietly, slowly, but it’s happening. Look around. Those wily Brits set up romantic alliances (think Diana and Prince Charles, Kate and Prince William, even Albert and Queen Victoria) to woe our sentimental hearts. They also have stepped up “royal visits” to the U.S. (ostensibly to check up on Canada, but... well, you know!).

As for taking over our movie and entertainment industry, just look at the British thespians who have stolen our Oscars: Judy Dench, the Redgrave family (father, daughters, and progeny), Helen Mirren, Michael Cain; and the musicians: Elton John and the Beattles; and comedians, Hugh Laurie and Stephen Frye, Benny Hill, and Molly Sug.

They’ve even invaded our food chain: replacing our favorite coffee with tea, teasing us with scones, beef Wellington, and crisps (My heavens, they’re French fries!).